Following my Friday fun questionaire post looking for an ideal women its led me to think what does make two people attract to each each other or even like each other.
I've just read a comment on Texasgal's blog where she has just been to a Pool party and mentions everyone getting older, fatter and even uglier (it comes to us all). She asks the question "How many would have picked their partner if they knew what they would look like today" ?
My gut feeling to this is most of them or it should be. If you think about this logically you should only ever pick a partner that you love been in the company of. If you pick a partner only because they look good on your arm or any other wrong reason it will almost certainly be a doomed relationship.
Ok we all can walk in a room and spot somebody who looks fantastic but if they are not compatable its a none starter. Personalty is far more important than image, both is just a bonus.
I think we pick our friends the same way, what is the point of hanging around with people we are not keen on, make us bored, when we could with people that we have fun with, you only live once. I think its our sixth sense that helps us choose the people we want to spend time with, I think the real key facts are :-
Fun to be with (makes us laugh)
Trust
Reliability
Supportive
I'm sure there are more.
In some respects I think I (and assume you) have picked my blogging friends the same way. Over the various posts a trust is built up, we offer each other support, we make each other laugh, etc.
Since I've started blogging I've looked at many blogs but only comment on the ones I think I'll like the person. Its strange because a lot don't even publish their photo, a lot of us are overweight, etc. I think this proves my point that looks arn't the most important thing when choosing friends.
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3 comments:
You may be attracted to the "look" but I think you date the personality. I've some folks that just physically aren't all that and a bag of chips but if they make me laugh or feel good about myself, I find I don't worry about how they look. If that makes sense.
I totally agree, its definately the person that matters whether we are talking about dating of friendship.
Anyone that thinks different is a fool.
"Bag of Chips" thats a new one to me I'll impress them in the pub when I use it.
I think you're absolutely right in the factors that make us choose the people with whom we want to spend time. Even more so with one's soul mate. I also think, and youe questionnaire suggests that you agree, that a person's looks do matter, especially with regards to a sexual partner. Matt and I would not have been attracted to each other if we were physically repulsive to each other. But the other stuff is what has made us life partners. We're each others best friends, share similar values, tend to react to the same people, situations, and events in the same ways. Those have been the key things for us.
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