We had a bit of a debate at work the other day on age gaps between partners. We had quite a few differing opinions (most of them from a selfish point of view). Remember most were male and some thought its ok to date a women much younger but not the other way around.
The more serious people came up with between 2 and 5 years.
Some people reckoned the man should always be older than the women, I don't go along with this theory.
I also think as you get older (I'm 48) the gap can get wider say 5 or 6 years but you wouldn't expect a teenager to date someone with that sort of age difference.
For the record the oldest person I have dated was a young 50 years old and that was when I was 42 so 8 years older.
I have had a number of dates with younger ladies varying from 1 to 12 years difference although my gut feeling is 2 years is about right but its still pretty good up to 6 years difference.
The bottom line though it is still down to the individuals and their feelings.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
9 comments:
I really think it helps if youre from the same sort of era, you have experiences in common, music, tv programmes all those sort of things. They may not be very important at first when the initial attraction kicks in, but it does later as the relationship goes on. My hubby is 1 day older than I am, and I always remind him every year! :)
I think it's up to the folks, too. Greg is 10 years older than I am. My nephew's wife is 14 years OLDER than he is. They gell together fine because their current interests are the same. My father was 12 years older than my mother.
It all boils down to chemistry and if your personality's "click".
That's my story and I'm sticking to it;)
honestly,
I think 10 years or more is just fine.
I live in a small town & I know a couple that is 20+ years apart in age, they have a bunch of kids (about 5) and were very happy until the day he died.
Ageism is just a stupid as sexism.
Airliebird,
I think your point of having things in common is important and more likely with people closer in age.
One day, I bet he never forgets your Birthday.
Rachel,
When I was in the States I did notice that large age gaps were quite common especially in Nashville (I suppose that is southern ish).
One young lady I met one night was 28 years old and I actually asked why she was spending time with me when the Bar was full of her own age group. She informed me it was quite a common thing in that area and she had actually divorced a 45 year old. She was a nice person and we have been in touch by e'mail since.
Lynn,
I've never heard of ageism been compared with sexism, good point.
It is also interesting to me that a 22year old thinks this way. I would expect it more from people my age.
20 years+ seems a very big gap and I couldn't see myself dating a 68+ year old (but 28 or younger now thats a thought).
Rachel,
I should have added the 28 year old thought blokes her own age were lazy assholes that didn't know how to treat a lady right.
As long as you have a connection, then I think age should be secondary. In thde past, I've dated men 10 years older, and 10 years younger. Now, I'm with someone who is 5 years younger than me.
We have a good connection, and I never feel older than him. Even though if I think about it, I was finished with high school when he was in the 8th grade! Ha! But we adults in our 30s now, so like you said it's different the older you are.
The only time I feel our age difference is when we recall things from our childhood, and he sometimes doesn't know what I'm talking about! LOL! Who knew just 5 years made that kind of difference in childhood memories.
Mo,
I'd forgotten that bit, I have quite a few younger friends and when I talk about things from my School days (the odd occasion I went) they look at me like "did that really happen"
I prefer dating men who remember the same 70's tv shows I do. I understand the 28-year-old who says men her age are "lazy assholes." Men aren't worth dating until they're at least in their early 30's.
Reg,
Its a fair point, looking at myself I was probably a complete prat until I reached around thirty.
Nowadays I actually take pleasure in treating a lady right (I can't believe I just wrote that but its true).
I think its all about learning respect.
Post a Comment